meme roundup – No Filter Blonde

35 Memes That Will Make you Feel Better About Being a Hot Mess

Bein’ a hot mess ain’t easy but it sure is common.

In fact, it’s one of the most popular topics in the parenting meme-iverse and recognized as the international symbol of acceptance among many parenting communities. Solidarity sister, we are in this sh*tshow together.

Check out these memes if you want to feel better about walking around all day with a chili stain on your crotch or accidentally sending a sext to your kid’s teacher. We gotchu, fam.

There’s nothing more versatile than the coveted baby wipe; you can use it for counters, asses and faces. (Just not in that order.)
Via @accidentalsupermom

I’m not lying when I say that dishes are the worst. I’m also not lying when I say the Skip The Dishes app is my new best friend.
Via @fakeadultmom
3.

Ahh cereal, a dinner time staple. Can I interest you in Le Chocolat De Count or Crème de la Cheerios?
Via @draggingfeeties

I mean, I’m not going to do anything about it other than find a new excuse for my hot mess couture, but…..
Via @mom.wine.repeat

5.

From pregnancy glow to aww hell no. You might not even see it coming but after a few years of being a SAHM, there’s a trainwreck leaving the station and you’ll be on it.
Via @macaroniandmomjeans

Luckily for us hot mess moms, camera filters have come a long way over the years and we can now easily hide those eye bags and chin hairs with a flip of a switch. Just don’t forget to flip that switch, because no one needs to know how hairy and sleep deprived we really are.
Via @momtransparenting

It’s complicated, don’t ask questions.
Via @askatewouldhaveit

8.

Spoiler alert: Still a hot mess, but a hot mess with amazing hair.
Via @macaroniandmomjeans

Surely this is a conspiracy, right? My Snapchat filters have led me to believe that I’m supposed to have butterflies floating around my head, giant eyes and glowing skin at all times. So who’s that swamp donkey in the security camera? I demand answers!
Via @unicornmoms

10.

I slipped into something a little more comfortable for you, I know how much you love Crocs and ripped sweatpants. Now get over here and run your fingers through my greasy hair before I’m not in the mood again.
Via @mommymemest

11.

ICEBERG STRAIGHT AHEAD!! We’re all gonna dieeeee.
Credit unknown

12.

You know what Susan, my kid is trying to take a dump behind that tree and I gotta bounce.
Via @itsmommyhour

13.

You might be a hot mess if this is a recurring fear you have every time you’re out in public now.
Via @snarkybreeders

14.

Where do I sign up because this is literally the only type of mom meetup I’d be on board for. I’ll bring the donuts and vodka.
Via @motherhaggard

15.

TRYING is the key word here. Spoiler alert: I don’t.
Via @alyceoneword

16.

THIS IS AN EMERGENCY! SEND BACKUP! And can you stop and grab me a latte from Starbucks when you’re on the way here? My caffeine levels are dropping rapidly and I may need an IV.
Via @stonecolddaddy

17.

Friends don’t let friends feel bad about how clutter-filled and messy their house is. They just push some crap out of the way to make a path to the wine.
Via @momcomnyc
18.

If you haven’t though about handing your kids off to strangers at least once, are you even a hot mess who is desperate for a break?
Via @bombingatmomming

19.

It brings a tear to my eye *Sniffle*
Via @fromthebottomofmypurse

20.

Mommy needs a LOT more beauty sleep okay, kids? Wake me up if anyone is bleeding or the house is on fire.
Via @motherplaylist

21.

About to lose it in 3, 2, 1……
Via @momof1anddone

22.

You mean 10 as in 10 thousand, right? *gulp*
Via @onefunnymummy

23.

And that’s on a GOOD day to be honest.
Via @paigekellerman

24.

The good news is that you can shove all your dresses into the back of your closet along with your razor.
Via @salty_mermaid_entertainment

25.

I don’t care where we go or how bad my hair looks as long as there are no kids and lots of alcohol.
Via @alyceoneword

26.

Wait, what are these real pants you speak of???!
Via @modernmomprobs

27.

I mean, it’s basically the same. Except way less f*cks and a lot more caffeine.
Via @modernmomprobs

28.

I paid $50 for this shit, it better make me look like Beyoncé within the next hour.
Via @justlikeatvmom

29.

Actually I can and I will. And if you have any more thoughts about this, tomorrow I’ll wear my robe and slippers too.
Via @reneecharytan

30.

Mysterious and interesting, yes, that sounds so much nicer than shit show hot mess.
Via @wheretheeffismyhandbook

31.

This is basically my mantra. Holla.
Via @lifeattiffanys

32.

Make it a Venti Grande Tall Extra Large with 2 shots of new life who dis?
Via @fakeadultmom
33.

Are there people who don’t do this? Teach me your sorcery.
Via @housewife_plus

34.

All this junk is just adding a natural rustic touch to the wood grain, so who’s the real winner here?
Via @marriageandmartinis

35.

The lady on the right looks like a hell of a lot more fun anyways. Just sayin.
Via @healthylivingforhotmesses

35 Memes that Explain What Self-Care Looks Like as a Parent

If you’ve ever fantasized about doing absolutely nothing at all for an extended period of time, you might be a parent who is in desperate need of some me time. Let’s face it, the words parenting and self-care go together like kids and a clean house. Or DJ Khaled and not saying his name in every song he mixes. What I’m trying to say is, they don’t go together, at least not naturally.

We went over unconventional methods of self-care in my previous post The Desperate Mom’s Guide to Self-Care, and today I’m hitting you up with a barrage of memes that spell out what self-care (or lack thereof) looks like as a parent. It’s a popular topic in the parenting community because WHO THE HECK ACTUALLY HAS TIME FOR THIS??

Maybe lavender would be more calming if you were hiding from your kids in a lavender field for a week. Or you could try this:

Via @kristinakuzmic

2. Self-care as a parent is best when setting the bar low, and then lowering it more, and then throwing the bar away all together and hoping for a miracle.

Via @Macgyveringmom22

3. Even though you might not have time for self-care or sitting in a chair, you might have time to fantasize about it often, which is basically the same thing, right?

Via @themomatlaw

4. If online shopping, binge watching Netflix and inappropriate humor are wrong, I don’t want to be right. And if this list isn’t self-care as a parent, I don’t know what is.

Via @mommyowl

5. Night time me is so ambitious; morning me is more realistic.

Via @mommycusses

6. Some may call this an unhealthy coping mechanism, but you don’t need to hear that kind of negativity in your life, it’s self-care.

Via @oldkidsbooks and @neverendingmommy

7. The best plans are no plans. Because sitting in your bed by yourself is self-care.

Via @fakeadultmom

8. I’d hang out in a manure farm if it meant I got to be alone for an hour. Okay maybe not a manure farm, but you get my drift.

Via @goldfishandchickennuggets
9. I pay $30 a month to have the occasional uninterrupted shower and I’m not mad about it.

Via @lessonsfromtheminivan

10. Self-care is what the Doctor ordered, too bad he didn’t have a script for it.

Via @macaroniandmomjeans

11. I prefer my pizza in my belly but this self-care aromatherapy bath looks (and probably smells) like heaven.

Via @vegansmoothiemama

12. When you’re a parent, anything can be self-care if you really believe in yourself.

Via @lifeattiffanys

13. When you get one self care appointment for the year, you need the all inclusive package.

Via @humorandwine

14. Sure yoga is cool, but have you tried a tranquilizer?

Via @mimosaswithmoms
15. Tropical getaways have a new definition when you’re a parent.

Via @accidentalsupermom

16. I’m not saying luxuries change after kids, but actually I am saying luxuries change after kids.

Via @silkymamas

17. &18. Whether you booze and meditate or booze and rage, I’m not judging your self-care routine.

Via @mom.wine.repeat and @macaroniandmomjeans

19. I don’t care, burn the house down, I’ll make s’mores.

Via @realramblinma
20. It’s only rock bottom if you’re parked at the edge of a cliff, you’re good boo.

Via @macaroniandmomjeans

21. CRAP. See also: WORTH IT

Via @howtobeadad

22. Parenting: if you want uninterrupted self-care, you might want to try an induced coma.

Via @mommymemest

23. I think this is actually the definition of self-care in the Webster’s dictionary.

Via @housewifeplus

24. Why not take advantage of those first few months when your baby is a potato and bring them along for Botox appointments.

Via @alrightmom

25. If you’re taking notes, there’s a lot of hiding and very little seeking in the parent self-care game.

Via @realtoughdad

26. Them: tell me your wildest fantasy
Me:

Via @mamasdoody

27. Spoiler alert: you don’t get to relax

Via @momtransparenting
28. So many mythical creatures, so little time.

via @mommyneedsamarg

29. Take my money! WHERE DO WE SIGN UP FOR THIS?

via @mommywinetime

30. Lonely? Nah, this sounds like the definition of heaven.

Via @katiebinghamsmith and @fromthebottomofmypurse

31. Take notes: these are the real MVP’s when it comes to gifts for a mom.

Via @askatewouldhaveit

32. Parenting: where you’re willing to lose your limbs for a few minutes of alone time.

Via @thenewstepford

33. Speaking of hiding in the bathroom, did you bring snacks?

Via @mommyneedsalife

34. Not everyone can afford a hotel, stop judging me Carol.

Via @paigekellerman_writer

35. Funny you mention it, I’m writing this blog post in this exact scenario. *fist bump*

Via @marriageandmartinis

25 Memes That Explain What it’s Like to be an Awkward Introvert Parent

Today is #nationalawkwardmoments day and if there was ever a national -insert random thing here- day that I could relate to on a soul level, this is it. (Other than national carbs and yelling day, but I don’t think that’s a thing yet.) If you’re awkward and you know it, raise your hand and trip over your feet at the same time! Then read these memes, because you might relate to a few.

1. Hello, I’d like to order a lifetime supply of these name tags please; also maybe it could say “please don’t talk to me” at the bottom?

Via @scarymommy on Instagram

2. Sometimes you just gotta fire off that text and stress about it for a million hours afterwards, amirite? Whatever keeps us up all night…

Via @lifeattiffanys on Instagram

3. My brain: Correction- everything was going well but now we bout to make shit real awkward. What should we do first to drive people away? Talk about diarrhea and hemorrhoids or sneeze into the punch bowl?

Via: @mommymemest on Instagram

4. I really need more friends but I don’t really want more friends, know what I mean? Listen it’s complicated Karen, let’s just cancel this play date and reschedule never mmkay? Good talk.

Via @silkymams on Instagram

5. Don’t make it weird, I’m weird enough.

Via: @snarkybreeders on Instagram

6. My Brain: Shut up! Pay attention to the social cues!
My mouth: nah, don’t listen to that, just keep talking until they run away fam!

Via @macaroniandmomjeans on Instagram

7. I’ve never felt so seen. If you feel this to your core, you might be an awkward introvert and you might be comforted to know that there are more of us out there, (mostly in hiding.)

Via: @bombingatmomming on Instagram

8. “It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time, Now I’m Filled With Regret”: the title of my autobiography.

Via @playdatesonfridays on Instagram

9. Okay byyyeee, it’s been great not catching up, ignore ya (I mean see ya) at the next forced social gathering.

Via @draggingfeeties on Instagram

10. Hmm, I don’t get it. *peers out from my spot behind the tree where I’m hiding from the other parents, only to find my child had joined me*

Via @mymomologue on Instagram

11. Introvert vacations: like regular vacations but without the people, overstimulation, noise and bright lights. See also: our beds.

Via @stamfordmommy on Instagram

12. I don’t like to brag but I’m committed to my fitness and avoiding people I know at all costs.

Via @difficultmommy on Instagram

13. It’s really weird, my phone does this thing where it rings while I’m trying to scroll through Instagram and also I don’t understand why you’re not texting me.

Via @cmonmama on Instagram

14. And this is why my mom friends are mostly on the internet. *shrugs*

Via @motherhoodunderstood on Instagram

15. This is fine. I’m fine.

Via @closetoclassy on Instagram

16. I’d love to come to your thing except I’m lying and I’d rather stay home and binge watch shows while eating snacks.

Via @closetoclassy on Instagram

17. Would you look at the time? It’s awkward o’clock and time to find a new park.

Via @the.nerd.dad on Instagram

18. I mean, yeah, I’m the life of the party if the party is filled with people I know and if the party is in my bed and there’s no other people.
“
Via @amyweatherly on Instagram

19. Please refer to my nametag in point #1 of this list.

Via the.nerd.dad on Instagram

20. Hey, do you guys like Guacamole and thrift stores? Who wants to play charades? No one? Cool, I’ll go first….

Via @mommymemest on Instagram

21. Dear cashier at Target, I thought we were friends after you asked me if I wanted a bag and that’s why I’m now telling you my life story.
Signed: a mom who doesn’t get out much

Via @macaroniandmomjeans on Instagram